The best man is the bridegroom’s valet (personal aide and advisor) through all stages of the wedding planning.
The best man is often the bridegroom’s brother or best friend.
The best man’s most important duties are to get the groom to the ceremony on time and holding the bride’s ring at the altar.
The clothing is alike the bridegroom’s, nothing else applies for the best man.
The best man organizes most often also the stag party. Moreover it is expected that the best man make the speech to the bridal couple during the dinner.
Inform the Toastmaster if you want to give a speech at the wedding.
Inform the Toastmaster in good time that you want to give a speech.
It is always a good idea to prepare what you will say in advance. Write down what you are going to say and practice. Do not read it word-for-word, but use some key words.
You can end or begin your toast with a quote. Identify yourself and your relationship to the bridal couple. The speech can include some embarrassing story, but must not destroy the wedding atmosphere.
If there are many speeches to the newlywed, it can be wise to make a short speech.
What wedding present shall you give the bridal couple?
If you have been invited to the wedding, it is expected to give a wedding present to the bridal couple. But what shall you give the bridal couple. If you are lucky, they have registered at some stores. The best man or the bride’s parents are most likely to have these lists.
But if they do not have such lists, you have to think of something.
Try to select a gift that can be to a great delight and use in the future. Traditional it is common to give presents to the home. Today, many bridal couple have lived together for some time before their wedding, which means that they have already set up their house.
A very pleasant gift is an event, e.g. a balloon trip, a golf weekend etc.
It is also very nice to give away something that you have made yourself, perhaps a woven rag carpet, a painted watercolour, a bread basket, a CD or DVD with happy wedding guests etc.
You are perhaps a carpenter. Why not offer your help when the bridal couple wants to build their porch.
Nowadays, it is rather common to prefer money for their marriage instead of traditional items. According to tradition it is not customary to desire money as a wedding present, but it has become increasingly common.
Remember, although you have declined to the wedding, it is expected that you congratulate the bridal couple with a wedding present.
How close to the wedding can a bachelorette party be held? What activities?
The bachelorette party is the bride-to-be’s last day in freedom! Often the maid of honour and bridesmaids can plan this party. Decide a date. Steer clear of the night before the wedding, the last thing the bride needs is a hangover or not enough of sleep!
Plan the bachelorette and bachelor parties at the same night. Why not meet at night’s end?
The bride should not have to contribute to the party.
Below, some suggestions on activities:
- A day or weekend spa event
- Karaoke
- Hiking
- Canoeing
- Horseback riding
- Camping – rent a cabin or a tent
- A day or weekend of skiing
- A day or weekend at the beach
- A dance course (perhaps practice the wedding dance?)
- Book a professional stylist
- Cruising
Remember, the goal is for the bride and her guests to just have fun before the wedding.
Bridesmaids are a support team for the maid of honour.
The bridesmaids are often some of the bride’s nearest friends and/or sisters.
The bridesmaids can be more than one, and the idea that a bride needs to be surrounded by unmarried women is ancient history.
Below some tasks for the bridesmaids:
- Help the bride to scout out her gown, shoes, jewellery and other accessories
- Plan and pay for the shower and bachelorette party
- Keep a record of all the gifts received
- Run errands for the bride
- Serve as an auxiliary hostess
- Carry the bride’s train whenever necessary
- Provide the bride with plenty of emotional support during the planning and on the wedding day
Of course the bride want her bridesmaids to look beautiful too! Try to find a dress in the most flattering cut and colour matching the bridal gown and bouquet. Think about dresses they could wear again, at the most reasonable price. (The bridesmaids are supposed to pay for the dresses themselves.) |
The maid of honour is the official right-hand-woman to the brid
The maid of honour is usually the bride’s sister or best friend. But more and more brides and grooms are having close friends of the opposite sex stand up for them. Following, some examples on what you do as the maid of honour:
- Help the bride before and during the wedding day with all practical duties
- You are the leader of the bridesmaids
- Help shopping for dresses, dress fittings, jewelleries etc
- Responsible for the registration
- Plan the bachelorette party
- Help the bride get dressed
- Coordinating transportations etc
- Adjusting the bride’s train at the altar
- Holding the bridal bouquet during vows
- Holding the groom’s ring
- Take care of the gown after the ceremony
- Toasting the bride and groom
She is the last bridesmaid to walk down the aisle before the bride. It is nice if the bridesmaids’ dresses have the same colour. The bride of honour’s bouquet looks like the bridal bouquet, but is much smaller.
A good toastmaster is worth gold. She/he has the gift of speech and governs the wedding party.
To be the toastmaster is one of the most important duties on a wedding. It is important to find a suitable person in good time for the wedding. Her/his name should be stated in the invitation, so the guests know whom to turn to regarding the wedding party.
A tip, why not engage two persons responsible for the party. Perhaps, a couple among the bridal couple’s nearest friends.
The host and hostess appoint the toastmaster, of course in consultation with the bridal couple. To become appointed as a toastmaster is an honour. However, you can of course decline the offer, if you know you will not have necessary time available for all preparations.
A toastmaster is a cheerful person with the gift of speech, is patient and a very efficient administrator.
Some good advice:
- What does the bridal couple expects of you
- Start planning in good time
- Delegate duties
- Make a list of all wedding guests (addresses and telephone numbers etc)
- Identify the relationship between the bridal couple and their guests
- Make a list of the speakers, entertainers, singers etc. noting the length of appearances, the contents etc
- Plan the above together with the personnel
- Inspect the party site
- Ensure to be seated strategic
Traditionally, the speeches are delivered as follows:
- A toast for the bridal couple (toastmaster)
- Welcome (host/hostess)
- Bride’s father
- Groom’s father
- Officiant
- Relatives
- Brothers and sisters
- Maid of honour, man of honour
- Cousins, parent’s brothers and sisters
- Boss
- Fellow-workers, friends or similar
- Telegrams
- Speech of thanks (the hostess’ gentleman partner at table)
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We have articles for those who have been assigned an important role at a wedding.
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